This is a review for the much awaited conclusion of Penryn and The End of Days trilogy. I'm still waiting for this much awaited conclusion because I rThis is a review for the much awaited conclusion of Penryn and The End of Days trilogy. I'm still waiting for this much awaited conclusion because I refuse to believe what I just read was it.
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It's not that End of Days was necessarily bad or poorly written. No, it's not that. The writing is consistent with her previous novels and the novel itself was reasonably satisfactory. But I didn't want satisfactory for the end of Penryn and Raffe's journey.
This was supposed to be epic. Earth shattering. The emotions were supposed to be soaring out of control on a unicorn with no sense of direction except for up! This was supposed to be a roller coaster ride of emotions that doesn't stop until everyone on it has puked on each other's faces.
There was more emotion, sexual tension and drama in Angelfalls pinky finger than in End of Days' whole body. Where did that raw emotional connection go? What happened with these characters that they are just so blasé about each other and that I am, in turn, blasé about them?
God, by the end of the book I was just like:
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I'm not trying to be mean about this. I know it's hard to really knock it out of the park, but that's what this series deserved. It was owed so much more than this. I'm angriest because I know that Ee has it in her to wring truly powerful moments of raw emotion from her characters and readers. I felt it when Penryn was paralysed in Angelfall. I felt it when Raffe first realised Penryn was alive again in World After.
Yet I honestly can't think of a single moment of End of Days that sticks out to me as emotive or heartfelt. No single moment where my heart ached for the characters or the situation. Not a single Eeism, which I define as a condition when you want to marry a book because it gave you so many feels.
This isn't the review I wanted to be writing for End of Days. I kind of wish, now, that I had never read it and could keep going on imagining something more epic for these Starcrossed Lovers. Something that would do the story justice as a final book.
Sometimes I see a book tweeted about, or mentioned somewhere, and on the spur of the moment I’ll buy it. Randomly, I’ll neglect my careful pile of TBRSometimes I see a book tweeted about, or mentioned somewhere, and on the spur of the moment I’ll buy it. Randomly, I’ll neglect my careful pile of TBR ARCs that I’m supposed to be reading, deviate from my schedule and try something completely left wing. Sometimes this turns out really great. Sometimes it doesn’t.
This was one of those times where it doesn’t. Ever been in a dream that you kind of liked, though couldn’t help but notice that it made absolutely no sense? If you don’t, ReVamped is a great way to experience the sensation for yourself. A young, president’s daughter is off on her first assignment! To unite a ragtag group of weirdo vamps and turn them into a team! For reasons…
Unfortunately, things go awry when mysterious forces work to attempt to kidnap her! For reasons…
Luckily, there is a super hot guy who is mysterious, sexy, there to protect her and somehow knows something about her! For reasons…
ReVamped was kind of like if you took The Vampire Diaries and Mighty Ducks and created some kind of weird baby.
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There has got to be a fanfic of this somewhere…
It had the same kind of small-world,plot twists where everyone is related/knows each other somehow. Drama! So much drama! And the ragtag group was, on one hand, extremely formulaic and, on the other, probably the best thing about this novel. They were funny, interesting characters – eventually. Unfortunately, getting them there required the smoothest road of annoying blandness I’ve ever come across.
Indeed, the beginning and ending of this story are its weakest links. The very beginning because the author hasn’t finessed the balance of info dumping and narrative commencement. Thus the beginning was like an alarmingly boring series on infomercials where I was left wondering if I could just skip it or flip to another channel.
“How’s it going, Dad?” I asked.
*Insert two paragraph explanation on protagonist’s relationship to father.
“Swell, daughter, I’m off to see the president tomorrow!”
*Insert three paragraph explanation on how her father is the president of vampires and how that came about.
“Oh, wonderful! Hey can I totes head out of here on a mission? I’m heaps bored.”
*Insert two paragraphs of the protagonist wallowing over her caged childhood and giving her entire back story.
“Sure.”
*Insert characters extreme excitement and mental checklist of everything she’s going to do*
It was so clunky and awkward that I found myself cringing, this was proceeded by the most inane, colourless writing, though that did improve. It read a lot like a child’s fanfiction, which was interesting as the writing did pick up a good deal more later in the story.
The romance with the lead character was absolutely bland. It seemed there was more focus on making him as mysterious and surly as possible to shoehorn him into a popular archetype than to actually develop him as a character, or the relationship in any meaningful way. I felt like I slipped on a banana and they were in love.
Throw in some fiendish, mustache-twirling villains, a completely ridiculous ending which stretched even my ability to suspend my disbelief and you end up with ReVamped. Something that seemed to realize how campy and silly it was, but ultimately, never managed to pack in the fun, vitality and necessary introspection to really pull off the effect.
Over all, I cautiously advise reading the free sample before purchasing this one!...more
Nameless is a bit like billowing, amazing clouds on a warm sunny day. It’s nice. Just really nice, you know? Sure, it doesn’t move fast and clouds areNameless is a bit like billowing, amazing clouds on a warm sunny day. It’s nice. Just really nice, you know? Sure, it doesn’t move fast and clouds aren’t the most gripping things to look at, but it was just really nice. God I really liked Nameless and I really like clouds. They’re so magical.
[image] Unless they’re giving you goatse. Don’t look that up if you don’t know what it is btw.
Nameless wasn’t a perfect novel, but it was an enjoyable novel. I feel like most of the things it set out to do, it accomplished.
Things like creating, nurturing and building the relationship between Nico and Cami. Book, candle, Nico *cue heart melt* (you’d get it if you read the book). There felt like a depth of years to their relationship and that’s a hard thing to manufacture in a few hundred pages.
Nameless was a pretty ambitious story, which worked out for me because I’m a pretty ambitious reader, but it’s not going to float everyone’s boats. And that’s because it’s ODD. It’s just a really odd book.
[image] Like Harley Quinn – twisted but in a really, really good way
Firstly, nameless is an alternate reality world with a whole slew of different rules and supernatural… things happening. And St Crow doesn’t hold no hands when she tells this story. She doesn’t sit you down and say, “Now children, this is a twist. It’s a person who has twisted in bad way due to emotions…” Nuh-uh. She just starts throwing this lore at you and expects you to catch up. You have to pay attention or you’re not going to know what’s happening.
And her lore isn’t simplistic. It’s a complicated world. Add to that, the fact that there’s so much going on. Camille isn’t just dealing with figuring out who she is and avoiding being turned into a heartless shish-ka-bob. She’s dealing with Nico learning to take responsibility for his temper and his life, helping her friends, developing a friendship with the mysterious gardener, finding a home and identity for herself and, most of all, trying to get people to damn well shut their mouths and let her express herself.
Which is hard, because she has a significant stutter all throughout the book. This had the potential to be frustrating for the reader. But I think St Crow really pulled it off. Instead of feeling frustrated, I felt HER frustration. That people wouldn’t wait to hear what she had to say, would assume what she was thinking because they were too lazy to wait for her to say what she really wanted, etc.
But, the thing with Nameless is that it’s a really slow burn. Just so slow. And since so much of it is internal, emotional issues being worked through, it sometimes felt like it was dragging.
There were some elements to the story telling that I wanted to be tighter. Stronger. The Snow White myth felt really lost in the story. Rather like it was grossly outweighed by all the other elements until, sometimes, it became easy to forget that this was a Snow White retelling. This is an issue because Nameless could easily have been a standalone novel with no ties to Snow White. I would have liked it still and wouldn’t have felt a little cheated on the fairy tale retelling aspects that felt largely shoe-horned in at the end to justify the label.
Mostly though, if you’re a fan of Lili St Crow, or YA Paranormal romances with a touch of thriller to them, then you’re really going to like this one.
This book was provided to me by the publisher. This does not affect my review in any way because they refused to pay or bribe me. Greedy buggers. Left with no other option, I was forced to be honest....more
If you can’t love Dante Walker then you’re probably not going to love this book. He is cocky, flamboyant, arrogant, hilarious, and sassy. Luckily for If you can’t love Dante Walker then you’re probably not going to love this book. He is cocky, flamboyant, arrogant, hilarious, and sassy. Luckily for me, I absolutely loved him. Victoria Scott has perfectly encapsulated the jerky, arrogant seventeen year old who thinks he’s a straight up badass – and nothing is more satisfying than watching Dante Walker realize that not only does he have a sweet, kind side, but he’s also a good person and a good friend.
The book basically went like this:
Dante would be all like:
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And outwardly I would be like:
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But then when I thought the book wasn’t looking, I’d be like:
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There’s another character, Charlie Cooper, who I just loved. Mostly because, though Dante is so mean about her at the beginning, Scott wrote her with such empathy and compassion. Even while Dante was waxing poetical about how unattractive and what a loser she was, and even while she was acting like a loser, I still loved her. I think everyone who’s been an awkward teenage girl could see part of themselves in Charlie.
Whilst the writing of The Collector was pretty good, it was the slang and dialogue that really got me. Basically, she nailed it. Nailed teenage guy with a great finesse. The plot itself is pretty cool if a little simplistic. Bad Collector dude spies innocent virgin girl. Shenanigans ensue. It was hard for me to grasp the greater moral aspects of the book, the struggle between good and evil etc when I spent the whole book going, “God, girl! Just ride that guy to O-Town already!” As the book progressed, I found myself rocking backwards and forwards begging her to not change. NEVER CHANGE, CHARLIE!
I guess this was the only aspect that I found a little less satisfactory than I would have liked. For me, where it really made up for it was the characters. The dynamics between Blue and Dante and Charlie. Between the Liberator and Max and Dante. Between them all. I just couldn’t get enough of those awwwwww moments. And then it ended, and I wanted more. Especially more of teh sexy. Which meant I finished the book shaking my fist at Victoria Scott, saying:
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Which is really just my way of saying, “I love you.”...more
Some people are really going to like Prophecy Girl. People who like a very distinctive protagonist voice littered with pop culture references. Fans ofSome people are really going to like Prophecy Girl. People who like a very distinctive protagonist voice littered with pop culture references. Fans of Vampire Academy, who are looking for something similar, will also probably at least be interested – if not enjoy it. I don’t think it’s unfair to state that Prophecy Girl is highly derivative of Vampire Academy. Non Academic, rough and tumble protagonist with an intelligent best friend, falls in love with hot young tutor, crazy shenanigans, magical world – it was all very highly reminiscent. Derivative doesn’t necessarily mean it’s bad, but in this case the comparison doesn’t favor Prophecy Girl. In a Who Wrote It Better? competition, Mead comes out a clear victor.
[image] I would give that outfit a 9/10. Gorgeous, gorgeous job!
[image] I would say… less.
The story is heavily focused on the romance between Amelie and Jack, which I felt was a misstep as it rarely managed to run anything but hot (fan yourself, dim the lights, spark some candles hot) and cold (wet, dead, stinky-fish cold). The chemistry was there in a physical sense and I give White props for that – but any real camaraderie, relationship or love were painfully absent or ineffectually handled for me. Mostly because there simply wasn’t time to develop it.
But the plot itself was the biggest let down. I feel like by the time the author gets through all her surprise twists, the original motivations and actions of the characters don’t make much sense. I read the ending actions with critical detachment as characters did things that seemed inexplicable to me. The ending was pretty broadly forecasted in a way that sucked enjoyment from the narrative. Early on two characters step onto the page and my initial reaction was, “Well, they’re clearly evil. I don’t know how or why but… EVIL!” And I was kind of sad to see that I was right. That things were so clearly telegraphed.
Even a major plot event happened that was so obvious, my brain kind of hurt reading it. I thought, surely, it can’t be this easy. Then it happened, to everyone’s shock but mine. For me? I was just like:
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Writing was okay, no real issues there, which is a positive. And if you are looking for something just a bit steamy, then you’re surely going to at least enjoy it.
Ultimately, I think this is a good book if you’re looking for something quick, easy and that will give you a couple of laughs. But one of the greats, it is not.
I’m not sure how to proceed with this review WITHOUT resorting to a shit ton of gifs. I just really feel like some kind of crazy wild action would betI’m not sure how to proceed with this review WITHOUT resorting to a shit ton of gifs. I just really feel like some kind of crazy wild action would better represent how I feel than words ever could.
I mean, I could say that The Eternity Cure is one badass tale that left me desperate for more because this story was fucking awesome. Or I could just do this:
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Which is, no joke, my exact facial expression upon finishing this book. I think it actually stayed like that for a full two minutes.
I could tell you that Allison Sekemoto was such an unmitigated badass that I am prepared to lay my sword down at her badass feet and swear my fealty to her as the god of badass forever. Or I could just do this:
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See how much easier that is? I can’t write this bloody review because I’m too busy stalking Julie Kagawa and thinking of ways to beg her to hurry up and give me the next book. I need it. Seriously. And I can’t even talk about this book much, because I don’t want to spoil anyone. But I will let you know some vague things that you can expect:
1) Allison Sekemoto continues to be a stone-cold, kick-ass, awesomely awesome protagonist.
2) There are smoochies.
3) Things need to be killed and Allison is exactly the person to do it.
4) This is a creepy fucking book and I still shiver occasionally when thinking about it.
5) Some people in the book are horrifically horrible and terrifying.
6) Some people in this book are kind of sweet and make me smile.
7) Kanin <3
8) There is a return of a character I didn’t expect and he was fuckin’ ACE, man.
9) Be prepared to want to have everyone’s babies. Just everyone’s.
10) Read it. That is all.
I have to admit, like The Immortal Rules, it started out a little slow. Allison’s naivete and willingness to trust scumbags annoyed me. However, it didn’t take long before I fully endorsed pretty much each and every decision she made. She’s just so… cool. Kagawa throws the readers right back into this creepy, desolate, and somewhat hopeless world. But somehow, when the characters in this book teamed up ready to go kick ass, I just felt this rightness. Like, “Hell yeah! It’s ASS kicking time!” For those who don’t know, ass kicking time comes right after Balls-to-the-wall crazy time, and briefly before Cleaning-blood-out-of-your-clothes time.
I propose we begin a foundation. Survivors of the Everneath Series Anonymous. Because this book seriously gave me ALL the feels:
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I’m going to trI propose we begin a foundation. Survivors of the Everneath Series Anonymous. Because this book seriously gave me ALL the feels:
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I’m going to try to do this without spoiling the last book or this one, kay my friends?
Nikki needs Cole’s help in the Everneath. She has to make it through three mazes, avoid zombie-like wanderers, the Queen of the Everneath and the Shades or she and Jack are going to die.
And can I just say: GOD THIS BOOK! WHY?! WHY!??!!?! Ashton, do you feed on our tears? Do you use them in your magic spells? Do you boil them in your brews? How could you give us such an ending – AGAIN!?
I read the last page of this book with the colour draining from my face, shaking my head and going, “No! No! Noooooo! She got me again!” I mean, there’s just so mean you can be to your readers before they’re justified in kidnapping you and forcing you to hand over any and all sequels!
Nikki continues to improve as a character – taking leaps and bounds as a stronger, more amazing character. She is not afraid to hit back at life and she doesn’t hesitate to kick butt when it needs kicking. However, the scene stealer is most definitely Cole who will charm the pants off you, then charm your pants, then steal your pants. Because that boy is evil and if I were to ever translate myself into a fictional world in order to meet him then I’d probably slap him, kiss him and then slap him again for good measure.
Seriously, this sequel was amazing and has set the bar very high for the third book in the Everneath series which I absolutely need. NOW!
This review, and others like it, can be found on my blog, ...more
Taylor’s gift is her ability to infuse every page with magic and emotion. I admire her writing even when my critical self finds fault with the story itself. Somehow, Dreams of Gods and Monsters is both far superior and somewhat inferior to Days of Blood and Starlight. Though neither can compare to the perfection of Daughter of Smoke and Bone.
I actually thought it was illegal for a novel with a cover this good to be so painful. Illegal! But when I checked with my lawyer, she said I should gI actually thought it was illegal for a novel with a cover this good to be so painful. Illegal! But when I checked with my lawyer, she said I should get out unless I was going to pay her – and I am definitely not going to pay her! Pfft. So I’m still not sure about that. But what I am sure about is that Amanda Sun has a lot of potential as a writer, even if this book was a painful mess for me. I know that doesn’t seem to make sense. Even I can’t explain it.
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It’s redeeming feature is that, once the relationship between Katie and Tomo was underway, the story did pick up considerably due to the not-insignificant sexual chemistry between the two. No points if you’re able to guess the reason for that!
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Okay, I lie. I never really got Katie’s Tomo obsession. I can tell Amanda Sun has a talent and knack for manufacturing a sweet and tender relationship. When Tomo and Katie were together, it was the only time I really liked them. Individually, though, meeeeehhhhhh. Tomo was more like the paper drawings he made – just a bunch of ink on the page.
Katie fares only marginally better. This girl must seriously be a 9/11 truther or false flagger. Everything makes her suspicious. Give her a look and she’ll stalk you for months! Teenage boy spends time alone? Most normal people would rightly assume excessive masturbation on his part. Not Katie. Something’s gotta be up with that, amirite? I could make fun of her all day, but you have to give it to her. Crazy stalker or not, the girl has agency. She believes in her instincts, stands up for herself and makes her own decisions. Especially when it comes to the decision to stalk. Gotta give that girl some serious stalking props too, may I add.
So the characters can be flat and irritating, but the story still has entertainment value and the setting itself is detailed and almost lovingly illustrated for the reader. But, and here’s the big BUT. Narratives are a bit like pitches. If you see them coming too often then it’s gameover. Ink has so many tells, I hope it doesn’t play cards. The characters are always about five steps behind the reader and every plot point is thoroughly predictable.
Ultimately, it’s not a horrible book. It’s just generic, which is the most disappointing of all. Because for many people out there, Japan and everything related to it holds a special place in our hearts. So when an author is setting their novel there, it really needs to be something amazing. It needs to be near perfection to live up to all our hopes and dreams. There’s a lot of power in fulfilling hopes and dreams. And you know what they say about great power?
This ARC was provided to me by the publisher for reviewing purposes. This did not entice me to be any less annoyingly opinionated than I would otherwise be....more
Look, last time I knew Ethan he was a five years old. Please tell me I'm not the only one conflicted about the boy on the cover! I almost didn't want Look, last time I knew Ethan he was a five years old. Please tell me I'm not the only one conflicted about the boy on the cover! I almost didn't want to read this book because I kept expecting Chris Hansen to come in and tell me to take a seat.
Then I'd be like, "I swear! He's sixteen! I just READ about him when he was five! He's totally of age now!"
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Then I'd cry dramatically JUST like this.
But, facts are facts, folks. Ethan's aged like a fine brandy if brandy had washboard abs and a butt built for spanking. AAAAAAaaaaaannndd, I just reach my creepy quota for the review. Wow. That didn't take long.
So Ethan meets up with Love-Interest while trying to avoid the Fae working their darndest to ruin his life. To save his and the Love-Interest's life they escape into Fairyland to track down his sister and solve the mystery and try to save the world.
More Facts: you don't need to have read the Iron Fey series to read this book. There's enough back history and explanatory exposition to make it through. I certainly haven't read The Iron Fey series and I managed to enjoy this one as a standalone.
Like angst? Ethan's your main dude. Seriously. Kid could bottle that stuff. I'm sure there's a roaring trade in teenage self-pity tears. But he's balanced out so nicely with Kenzie who would, by herself, be kind of a meh character. I might have found them both insufferably frustrating except they seemed to bring out the best in each other. So if teenage hot boy angst is your thing - hit this one up! It has it in spades.
Other than that you have all your old friends back. Meghan, Ash, Grimalkin, Puck et all and then you have some newer ones and then you have a pretty decent and solid mystery/action story going on.
Julie Kagawa's come along way since the first novel of hers that I read, The Iron King. I didn't get bored, kept eye rolling to a minimum and largely enjoyed the narrative.
There's one young man in the book though, I won't mention who he is. But I will say this: Son. SON! Don't go breaking our hearts, m'kay? You've reduced me to quoting Elton John here. It doesn't get more serious than this.
So, over all summation is that I want to hunt down the Iron Fey series and read that. Then I want to hunt down the novellas and read them. Then I want to start badgering the Harlequin Teen's publicist to put me on the list for the next one. I'd say that's a ringing endorsement. Wouldn't you?...more
I make no secret of the fact that I love Moskowitz’s work with the power of a thousand Beiber fans except I don’t need to suspend my disbelief in MoskI make no secret of the fact that I love Moskowitz’s work with the power of a thousand Beiber fans except I don’t need to suspend my disbelief in Moskowitz’s ability.
Teeth is a heartbreaking novel about a lonely boy and an even lonelier magic fish boy. On an island there is a secret. The fish there are magic and they can keep you alive from even the most serious illness. Rudy moves there with his family for is brother’s sake, but things aren’t as simple as they seem when he meets Teeth.
As I’ve come to expect from Moskowitz, the writing is nothing short of spectacular and the characterization, Oh! The characterization! Here is a quote from my review of her book Gone, Gone, Gone about her characterization:
“Well and truly it is the intense characterization of Craig and Lio that make this novel. Clearly Moskowitz doesn’t just do characterization. She DOES characterization. You know. Like, when she writes a character – that character has been written. That character KNOWS it’s been written. That character will probably tell all it’s friends about that time it was written really well. Then it will compare all other writings to the writing that Moskowitz gave it. Thoroughly.”
That is as true in Teeth as it was in Gone, Gone, Gone. Teeth and Rudy are incredibly complex characters – amazingly flawed and dysfunctional. Lonely, desperate, passionate, broken and utterly charming.
But the themes in Teeth are significantly darker than they were in Gone, Gone, Gone, making me hesitant to recommend it to those unable to cope with issues of serious and repetitive sexual abuse. Teeth is dark. Teeth is very, very gothic and depressing and sad. Sometimes I wondered if it was too sad, too dark, too emotive. There’s very little cheer and fun to be had in it. But it turns out it’s just the right amount of dark, sad and emotive for me because I still loved it.
And if you love Moskowitz, it is likely that her ability to make you feel, to illicit a remarkable amount of empathy for her characters, to bare their soul to you – is one of the biggest attractions. That is what you consistently get with Moskowitz – so if you’re up for another beautifully written tale with a fresh bunch of characters waiting to make your heart bleed, then this is for you. If you’re in the mood for something that will make you laugh and feel good, then maybe you’re better off moving along.
And, people, when you do make it to the end of this book, just remember, I’m here for you.
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*An ARC was provided to me by the publisher. No gifts, favours or money was exchanged for this review.
Whilst I was aware of this novel before Stephanie read and reviewed it, it didn’t strike me as something that I needed to read until that point. ThereWhilst I was aware of this novel before Stephanie read and reviewed it, it didn’t strike me as something that I needed to read until that point. There are many unfavourable comparisons to Twilight floating around. This is not an invalid point.
-6 inhuman teenagers who pretend to be siblings – 1) the love interest (Edward/Daemon) 2) the delicate best friend of the protagonist (Alice/Dee) 3) The bitch sister who doesn’t approve (Rosalie/Ash) 4+5) Background dudes who we don’t see a lot of – one of which is partnered with Alice/Dee.
-New girl MC goes to school and meets asshole who is only behaving that way to protect his family.
-New girl is with sole parent who provides highly dubious supervision and new girl acts like the parent – cooking, cleaning, shopping etc.
-Love interest is devastatingly, unbelievably, inhumanly hot.
Blah, blah, blah – we all know the deal. And I knew this going in – but was willing to go with it anyway because, as Steph repeatedly told me, “It’s like she wrote what Twilight SHOULD have been.”
To that I say: maybe, yes, kind of, no, a little – but mostly… I guess?
So let’s get this out of the way quickly:
If you enjoyed Twilight but found the relationship dynamics, i.e. Bella Swan’s permissiveness and stalkish tendencies to be aggravating, then this is your perfect novel. Go forth and multiply, my friend. You will be in heaven.
And I can certainly see how this novel could be as addictive as many of my friends say it is. Katy and Daemon scenes, when he’s not being a complete and utter dick, were exceptionally hot. But, to be clear, by scenes I mean “scene” (because there was only one of them – and he went right back to being a dick afterwards) and that wasn’t enough for me.
But I could have put that aside, technically, and given this book a higher rating if I hadn’t found myself, for a not insignificant amount of time, bored with the story. Don’t be fooled by the fact that I breezed through it in a few hours. I was trapped in bed all day with sickness. There were a couple of times where the slightest distraction, had one existed, would have fairly swept me off my feet and away from the narrative.
Then I started imagining a drinking game for every time I could have come up with a better comeback than Katy. Not an alcoholic one, because I’m sick, but with actual water in the hopes that I wouldn’t dehydrate – which I didn’t. Some of my favourites included: “Glow-stick-for-a-dick”, “Over-grown Fairylight”, “Skinny, limp Twat-bedazzler” and “You have all the charm of a facehugger and only the half the technique, you extraterritorial welfare-mooch!” (this one, clearly, happened after a certain scene that readers will all know and understand my reaction to.)
But, and it must be said, having such a strong reaction to the love lives of the characters was a huge indication that I was at least invested, and after reading hundreds and hundreds of books, the ability to still get invested can sometimes be something of a gift. Ultimately I did like Katy even if, as far as I was concerned, she was far too permissive of Daemon’s behaviour. Sticking around and giving him a break when my personal sense of vengeance would have seen a different, more violent and less polite response. And I did, in true guilty-pleasure style, enjoy enough of the book to at least read the free chapters of its sequel, posted at the back.
I decided that I will very likely read the next book, because it seemed much more my thing – and I think that interest in reading the subsequent novel is the highest praise I can give.
Extra points* to whoever comes up with the best curses to throw at Daemon in the comments!
*Points are completely meaningless, have no value, and result in nothing other than my esteem.
Whether or not you enjoy this book depends on what you were expecting to begin with. No Really. Look at that cover, reread the synopsis and decide Whether or not you enjoy this book depends on what you were expecting to begin with. No Really. Look at that cover, reread the synopsis and decide right now what you’re hoping from this book. Is it:
a) A dark, twisted retelling of Alice in Wonderland with zombie creatures?
b) A high school melodrama about ghost/zombies with no real Alice in Wonderland connection.
If you thought B then good for you. Read this book. If you thought A then back the hell off now. This is not the book for you and you will likely be disappointed.
I thought A. From the title and the vague synopsis I believed that this would be an Alice going into zombieland and dealing with a dark, unsettling, gory version of Wonderland with many of the themes and symbolism from the original story modernized and reimagined in this book. I thought this was going to be a book version of American McGee’s Alice.
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Now, just to make it clear. It’s not a book or author’s fault if that book was not what the reader imagined. But I do think the title and synopsis is misleading considering a number of people, myself included are probably a little confused about what this actually is. The synopsis is vague, mentioning only revenge and monsters and a bad boy.
So let’s clear this up. This is what Alice in Zombieland is:
Alice’s entire family die in a car crash. Her father, who always believed in zombies (they aren’t physical zombies. They’re incorporeal, evil spirits that attack and eat your soul) is eaten. Alice, orphaned, goes to a new school where students act strangely. In particular, a student name Cole who is all badass and secretive. Instalove, love triangles, special girl with special powers later, blah blah blah THAT is the story.
In fact it felt, while reading, that the Alice in Wonderland elements were shooed in at the last minute and didn’t feel as though they were native or even relevant to the story. Certainly, whilst the author links to a couple of small, inconsequential details like the white rabbit and the Cheshire cat, none of the themes of Alice seemed touched upon or incorporated into the story as a whole. Which is a shame because the coming of age in a strange and crazy world that everyone thinks is normal theme would have worked so extremely well IN A YOUNG ADULT NOVEL ABOUT ZOMBIES!
But instead of talking about what I wanted the book to be – what is the actual book like? Well, just not for me. Showalter is transitioning from adult paranormal romance to YA and I don’t think it was successful. She built Cole off the foundation of a romanticized Alpha male – if that’s your thing fine, but I think the effect is lost when the audience is reminded that this is a sixteen year old boy. Like when they’re at the club and intimidating grown men away from the girls by growling. Yeah…
Alice is a reasonable character, though not one I had a great deal of interest in. She simply capitulated too much to Cole’s cavemanish tendencies to keep my interest. The general cast is alright but it is quite sizable and burdens the plot with a great deal of what felt like unnecessary posturing and conversing over things the audience already knows.
I somewhat expected better from the writing considering this is far from Showalter’s debut novel. The action scenes did not feel well realized and the final battle was amazingly short and anticlimatic. There was a focus on the romance. To be fair, it’s by no means a single-minded focus, simply too much for me considering I had no investment in their relationship to begin with. Instalove is not a plot device that I like. I never felt that I championed the relationship between these two characters because it never seemed to me that they had any chemistry to begin with or even liked each other – at all.
My basic advice before buying this book would be to read as many reviews of it as you can by people whose opinion you trust, decide if it is something that’s going to appeal to you and read the sample online before you purchase.
Basically, would it have been too hard to have a story where Alice and the Mad Hatter throw down in a knife fight? Really, guys? REALLY?!...more
I don’t read many books that I would rate 1 star these days. I seem to have mastered my preferences and hit a stride of excellent books – or at leI don’t read many books that I would rate 1 star these days. I seem to have mastered my preferences and hit a stride of excellent books – or at least mostly readable books.
Admittedly I only made it fifty-six pages into this book before I threw my hands up in disgust and tossed a pillow at the wall – so I suggest you take that into account when deciding whether to buy this book.
Why did I stop reading? First reason:
The death of a token character
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We didn’t know her long enough, but I’m pretty sure she could play base.
Right off a POC character is killed and whilst that would be annoying in its own right, since killing off POC characters is a frustrating cliche in books, TV shows and films, this was even more annoying. Firstly because her description was extremely stereotypical – to the point that she was less of a character and more of a caricature. Perhaps even worse and more degrading is that there was no real lament to her death. It was used as a story progression so that the male protagonist could wax lyrical about how beautiful and brave the female protagonist for trying to save the dying POC character. I kid you not. A girl is dying in a terrifying, violent, horrifying way and this is what he’s thinking:
“It’s just that… she doesn’t look as though she needs help. Her pale face is contorted with anger. Not fear. Not distress. Just fury. Her white hair floats like an aura, jerking in delayed reaction with each of her capable movements.”
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Like I said – a girl just died and he’s having a hard on for Emma. And even worse, we’re supposed to be having a hard on for how awesome Emma is. The text is all about Emma.
In fact, Chloe’s death seems to be nothing but an agent for making us sympathetic for Emma. It felt cheap and dirty. Sure, taking on a bullshark is a seriously awesome thing to do. Almost as awesome as that time I wrestled a crocodile. But let’s not get off track here. When sitting down and planning how to make a main character rock super hard, I could think of a hundred ways that didn’t involve creating a token character, immediately killing her off and then using that death to wank about how awesome the protagonist is.
I mean, first of all… gross from an imagery point of view. Second of all, holy flipping duck twat, Batman, way to be offensive!
Second reason:
The sexism.
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There’s nothing wrong with creating a sexist society. However, there is some responsibility when doing so. That the writing doesn’t actually support or romanticize or give tacit approval for the sexism is a good start. Of Poseidon features a heavily misogynistic mermaid society. And as such, the male characters act like a bunch of misogynistic dicks. Once again, completely understandable. But then it’s when everyone else just kind of goes along with that and doesn’t see a problem that my eye started to twitch. And then when some pretty outright paternalistic bullcrap takes place, I started seeing red. Like when a stalker mermaid arrives for a female character, Rayna. They are mated against her will and her refusal and hatred of him is treated as a comical device in the story – just her being a fickle and childish girl – not actually a woman rebelling against a system that doesn’t allow her to choose her mate or even requires her to be present for the ceremony. She’s angry at him because they were childhood friends and he’s always known that she never wanted to mate. He went behind her back, asked her Dad and organized for them to be mated. She’s pissed at him. Naturally. Personally, I would have seduced him out onto an isolated locale and impaled him on a rock. Rayna’s anger and hatred toward him is just laughed off by everyone. Including her brother.
Excuse me? EXCUSE ME!? What the ever loving fuck?! Oh, I see. Women in this world don’t know what they want until the smarter, better men come along and show them. Right. RIGHT.
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Then there’s Gallen who is just sexist plain and simple. He dismisses his sister, does not discuss the information he’s working on with her – but will with her mate – another man. I am told that he takes over Emma’s life and treats her much like a bit of baggage in the name of taking care of her. I didn’t see any progression toward a less sexist Galen having any kind of revelation that women weren’t all a bunch of objects to be ordered around like sheep.
You expect women to be unreasonable barnyard animals too busy masticating and going into heat to do any reasonable and logical thought, fine. But think like that and try to be a romantic interest in a YA novel I’m reading? No way. Sorry, Galen. You are the weakest link. Goodbye.
Third reason:
The writing.
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I truly disliked the writing. Not only was it incredibly telling and flat but the story also jumped awkwardly between the first person narrative for Emma and the third person narrative for Gallen. It did not feel polished or finished at all.
“Stop!” she yells.
Galen stops. But Emma’s not talking to him. She’s talking to the shark.
And the shark stops.
Emma wraps both arms around Chloe and hugs her to her chest, leaning her friend away from the attack. “You can’t have her! Leave her alone! Leave us both alone!”
The shark turns, saunters away as if sulking.
SHARKS CAN SAUNTER?! AND SULK!?
I know what she’s doing here and that’s being abrupt and edgy with a tense moment. But I just trip over those sentences every time I read them. And a lot of this book is like this. Part of me wants to take a red pen to it and just clean it up a bit. It’s not like Banks is necessarily a bad writer – but that her writing isn’t smooth. There’s no poetry or rhythm to it. Just these jarring, awkward sentences that hurt my brain.
Fourth reason:
The characterization
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“Hi! My name is River Swan Desmonda Sparkle-Eyes!”
Emma was, in my opinion, a Mary Sue – and that is a term I don’t use often. Basically, I felt she was an author insert. Rare compelling eyes, one of a kind in her species, ultra special, father AND friend died to create sympathy. Even Gallen, when not with Emma, only thinks about Emma. He can sense her on land when that’s supposed to be impossible. It’s always the same with Mary Sues. Impossibility surrounds them and they’re just so fucking SPESHAL while being the most boring, repetitive, inoffensive turds around. The problem with Mary Sues is that, if you’ve read one you’ve read them all and the only thing that separates them is the degree to exactly HOW speshul and ewnique they are. And the more Mary Suish they are, the more the other characters spend every fucking moment talking and thinking about Mary Sue – which as far as I could see, was exactly what happened in this book. The only character flaw the author has given her is that she’s clumsy. Clumsy is not a character flaw. I’m sorry, but it’s not. It’s a lazy way of trying to make a young, beautiful female character immediately adorable and relatable to an audience and writers do it all the time. Stop. Just stop it, okay?
Even if the story telling explains the clumsiness (she’s not meant to be on land – she’s meant to be in the water) it still makes for a weaker character. Because if you can’t bare to give your MC a more intense flaw than ‘clumsy’ then that becomes ALL you can say about her. “What’s Emma like?” “Oh, she’s just this really clumsy, insecure teenage girl.” Clumsy and insecure? No! Never. That only marginally ties her to like 95% of the YA MC population!
Basically, I can deal with bad writing – to a degree. And bad characterization – to a degree. And sexism – to a degree. But throw them all in with the death of a token character and smoosh it into a terrible mess? Then I can’t deal. Then I throw my hands up in disgust, delete the book off my ereader and try to scrub my bloody brain free....more
Something Strange and deadly had a really rough start with me. There is a divide between the writing of the first chapter and the rest of the novelSomething Strange and deadly had a really rough start with me. There is a divide between the writing of the first chapter and the rest of the novel. The first chapter gave me the false impression that this book was flimsy, badly written and suffering from stagnant characters and plot.
However, this quickly faded away as Dennard hit her stride – introducing fresh, interesting characters, and intriguing plotline.
Dennard creates an interesting and fresh mythology in Something Strange and Deadly that mixes aspects of Steampunk with good ol’ zombie fun. In Elanore we find a fun, willful protagonist – driving the story forward and fleshing it out with wit, humour and a charm. She also makes a perfect balance between what you would expect of well-bred lady of her times, and a strong-willed, intelligent woman eager to prove herself. She certainly makes excellent use of her parasol at certain points in the novel in a way that would make womankind proud. However, I’m convinced that the parasol was its own character in this novel. Parasols make everything better. Parasols are awesome, but I digress…
[image] Everything!
Daniel, Jie and Joseph are the icing to a very fun cake. Particularly Daniel, with his abrasive, working class attitude and grouchy personality, which played nicely against Joseph’s gentlemanly persuasions and Jie’s serious case of kickass. Like, she just really kicked everyone’s butt in this novel at least three times and never once complained.
I’m one of those people who like steampunk things with monsters. Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter sounds like a terrible, stupid movie that is perfect for me.
What was extremely refreshing was that whilst there was some romantic involvement, it clearly took a back seat to the more pressing issue of masses of walking undead trying to make mince meat out of your internal organs. Plus there was mystery and intrigue and more mystery and action and butt kicking interspersed evenly and generously throughout the novel.
My only real complaint – putting the first chapter aside – was one minor issue and that relates to the simpleness of the mystery.
The ending was simply too obvious and came as something of a letdown to realize my suspicions from the very beginning were confirmed.
[image] When you resemble an owl and make this face, you know the mystery has been too easy.
Overall, this was a great read and I strongly anticipate the next one!...more
For me, there’s two kind of books I give low ratings to. Books that I thought were bad, or books that I simply didn’t enjoy. This is the later of thFor me, there’s two kind of books I give low ratings to. Books that I thought were bad, or books that I simply didn’t enjoy. This is the later of those two options. It’s not that Arise was necessarily bad, but that it wasn’t for me. For starters, I believe I mentioned in my review of The Treachery of Beautiful Things, that I need to pay more attention to book covers in order to avoid the whole purity thing. Once again, I clearly should have anticipated a big sex issue with this book based on the puritanical white dress and girl holding some type of greenery. I’m not sure who in our culture decided that white dress and foliage equaled hymen – but they did a really good job convincing everyone else (yes, the ferns represent death, but work with me here, people!). I was thrown off by the ghost part, because I honestly didn’t anticipate a book about a ghost in love with a boy would be all about how to have sex. It just wasn’t my thing – and particularly wasn’t the kind of book I wanted it to be. Which must be really annoying to fans reading this review and going:
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It’s not that the writing was bad. I didn’t feel like there were any real technical issues the author suffered from, but the plot took a significant amount of time to kick into gear, which made keeping my interest difficult. Because, you know, if someone isn’t about to have illicit smoochies or die on the very page that I’m reading then I’m bored. And this book started out well because it started out with illicit smooches. Between ghost girl and her boyfriend. So I was simultaneously impressed and disturbed.
[image] There’s a meme for everything, ya know?
But then we get to the main source of tension and part of the driving plot – they can’t…how do I put this politely? They can’t seal the deal, understand? It’s over before the cigar’s lit. The party’s started but the guests can’t come. I have no clue what I’m saying. Look, they can’t bone, alright?
So whilst other, more involved stuff is happening, in the background there’s all this tension on can they, or can’t they do the horizontal mamba. This is probably going to be very interesting, involving stuff for people who aren’t me. The point was always moot because it’s not my bag, baby. I’m more of a The Ghost and Mrs Muir kind of girl. I like my ghost stories to be all about that insanely secret, entirely emotional/intellectual bond. I want that bittersweet, mournful love where it’s already lost before it’s even started. For a dead girl, Amelia sees a lot of action. For starters, her and her boyfriend can make out and touch. A good portion of his family can see/talk to her and they even go out dancing together at a bar at one point. That felt like cheating a little. Being almost entirely intangible, immaterial and unable to touch or shape the world around you is one stable aspect that makes ghost stories powerful. Take that away and I feel like the whole story loses it’s best, most emotionally stirring aspects.
Maybe it’s an obsession YA has with being perfect and getting the perfect ending. When Vampires can come out in the sun and sparkle, when miracles are pulled out of a hat, when ghosts can go clubbing, they start to lose their interest for me. Which is a shame, because monsters and supernaturals, as they are, are the perfect metaphor for the awkward, disturbing, intimidating, frustrating experience that is puberty. Instead you just have pretty people with pretty problems and that’s simply doesn’t hold my interest....more
Kat Kennedy
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