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Mere Motherhood: Morning Times, Nursery Rhymes, and My Journey toward Sanctification
It was back in the 1980's when Cindy Rollins, then a new mom in search of the best ways to teach her baby son, first heard of homeschooling. Thirty years and nine children later, Cindy has become a popular blogger, podcaster, and award winning teacher. This is her story. It's a story of big families and cross-country moves, and small-town living. It's about great books and morning times and nursery rhymes. It's the story of a dedicated mother's journey toward the Truth and the family she brought along with her.
176 pages, Paperback
Published January 1, 2016
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July 18, 2016
Own.
I must admit, I loved this book from the moment I knew it was coming out.
I read Cindy's blog for years and years, so I knew she could write. I knew she offered humor and grace. I listen to her podcast, so I knew she had wisdom to impart. I knew she loves Jesus and always points readers and listeners to him.
My friend Sally, from church, was at the CiRCE convention and book release. She brought me a signed copy home. She handed it to me immediately before the organ prelude began the worship service. I didn't get a chance to really get started until around 8.
The first thing I noticed was how beautifully the book was constructed. The cover is both beautiful to the eye and to the touch, smooth as butter. The pages are almost as luscious to the touch: heavy and smooth and to the eye: with a soft white color and easy to read font. CiRCE did a wonderful job producing their first book.
Cindy has written a beautiful book. A great deal of it is memoir - remembering her path. Always laced with humor and a point; she is excellent at telling the reader like it is, and then reminding them of God's grace to remove any perceived sting. Her personality shines through, one of my favorite quotes - because it is just so Cindy - is "I never could understand why anyone would plant zucchini when they could plant larkspur." (pg 54)
A great deal of it, though, is instructive born out of her experience. She learned some things educating 9 children at home (understatement), and she shares them with us.
Her voice is conversational and gentle, but don't let that fool you. She is saying profound things, "That is how love works. You work hard at it and one day the work becomes joyful. Ordo Amoris." (pg 81) and "Education is tethering our children to the past so that they are not adrift in the universe." (pg 129)
The end, though, the end is a challenge. It is her story and a challenge born out of it. She tells us, here's my life, here's what I've learned, here's where I believe God is calling me to go - won't you come along?
I read it in one sitting (essentially, I had read through page 6 before I got home). Before I started, I decided to read it straight through without underlining or folding pages. I made it to page ix before I had to. Cindy reminded me, "God is real. He is there. He doesn't just love your children; he loves you. I have been young, and now I am old, and I have not seen the righteous forsaken." (pg ix, emphasis mine, I really needed to read that) I didn't mark a whole lot more - maybe 7-8 passages, not because I couldn't have marked things, but because I know I will return to this book again and again.
I knew I'd love Cindy's book, but I didn't expect I'd love it this much. I didn't know it would have such a deep impact on me. I cannot recommend it highly enough.
I must admit, I loved this book from the moment I knew it was coming out.
I read Cindy's blog for years and years, so I knew she could write. I knew she offered humor and grace. I listen to her podcast, so I knew she had wisdom to impart. I knew she loves Jesus and always points readers and listeners to him.
My friend Sally, from church, was at the CiRCE convention and book release. She brought me a signed copy home. She handed it to me immediately before the organ prelude began the worship service. I didn't get a chance to really get started until around 8.
The first thing I noticed was how beautifully the book was constructed. The cover is both beautiful to the eye and to the touch, smooth as butter. The pages are almost as luscious to the touch: heavy and smooth and to the eye: with a soft white color and easy to read font. CiRCE did a wonderful job producing their first book.
Cindy has written a beautiful book. A great deal of it is memoir - remembering her path. Always laced with humor and a point; she is excellent at telling the reader like it is, and then reminding them of God's grace to remove any perceived sting. Her personality shines through, one of my favorite quotes - because it is just so Cindy - is "I never could understand why anyone would plant zucchini when they could plant larkspur." (pg 54)
A great deal of it, though, is instructive born out of her experience. She learned some things educating 9 children at home (understatement), and she shares them with us.
Her voice is conversational and gentle, but don't let that fool you. She is saying profound things, "That is how love works. You work hard at it and one day the work becomes joyful. Ordo Amoris." (pg 81) and "Education is tethering our children to the past so that they are not adrift in the universe." (pg 129)
The end, though, the end is a challenge. It is her story and a challenge born out of it. She tells us, here's my life, here's what I've learned, here's where I believe God is calling me to go - won't you come along?
I read it in one sitting (essentially, I had read through page 6 before I got home). Before I started, I decided to read it straight through without underlining or folding pages. I made it to page ix before I had to. Cindy reminded me, "God is real. He is there. He doesn't just love your children; he loves you. I have been young, and now I am old, and I have not seen the righteous forsaken." (pg ix, emphasis mine, I really needed to read that) I didn't mark a whole lot more - maybe 7-8 passages, not because I couldn't have marked things, but because I know I will return to this book again and again.
I knew I'd love Cindy's book, but I didn't expect I'd love it this much. I didn't know it would have such a deep impact on me. I cannot recommend it highly enough.
April 21, 2022
Although I homeschooled for over a decade before needing to enroll my children in a classical Christian school due to divorce, I had given up on the idea that home education could ever again be realistic or adequate in my family’s case.
When I started listening to Cindy and Angelina on The Literary Life Podcast last fall, something woke in me as I started to read in a way I hadn’t for years… for myself. I told a friend that I felt alive again!
As I listened and read, the desire to homeschool grew once more. It didn’t hurt that two of my children had been asking to be taught at home for years… we tried in 2019-2020, but the timing was off. I began to pray that the Lord would make a way, somehow, for me to bring my younger children home, so we could all sit on the couch like we used to, reading good books together.
I picked up Mere Motherhood to read in faith, for something I couldn’t see yet, and wasn’t disappointed.
Cindy writes with humility and humor and HOPE. She writes honestly about the things she would have done differently, and about the pain as well as the blessing of home-educating a large family. She does it all without oversharing, or telling stories that aren’t hers to tell. She points to Jesus Christ as our true identity and meaning and rest.
Tears rose in my eyes multiple times as I read. I don’t know how the Lord is going to shape the future of my family, but I am trusting Him to do His work.
When I started listening to Cindy and Angelina on The Literary Life Podcast last fall, something woke in me as I started to read in a way I hadn’t for years… for myself. I told a friend that I felt alive again!
As I listened and read, the desire to homeschool grew once more. It didn’t hurt that two of my children had been asking to be taught at home for years… we tried in 2019-2020, but the timing was off. I began to pray that the Lord would make a way, somehow, for me to bring my younger children home, so we could all sit on the couch like we used to, reading good books together.
I picked up Mere Motherhood to read in faith, for something I couldn’t see yet, and wasn’t disappointed.
Cindy writes with humility and humor and HOPE. She writes honestly about the things she would have done differently, and about the pain as well as the blessing of home-educating a large family. She does it all without oversharing, or telling stories that aren’t hers to tell. She points to Jesus Christ as our true identity and meaning and rest.
Tears rose in my eyes multiple times as I read. I don’t know how the Lord is going to shape the future of my family, but I am trusting Him to do His work.
July 17, 2016
Homeschool blogger Cindy Rollins has written a book about her experiences as a mother and homeschooler. This is a lovely book, with a conversational tone that easily touches one's heart. Cindy doesn't believe in 'airing dirty laundry', so she is carefully circumspect in her recounting of past events and her own sorrows and regrets. Yet she makes it clear that her family faced challenges and were given greater understanding of God's sovereignty in the process. I love her clear testimony that God is always at work on us for our good and for His glory.
Cindy is a good writer, as I knew from reading her blog, but she reaches a new level of polish and beauty in this book. She has chosen clever chapter titles and quotes that enhance each section. She uses cliff-hangers skillfully without overdoing the technique, and she narrates her experiences in a way that points beyond herself to the bigger picture.
This truly is a book for moms of all ages. Young mothers will benefit from wise counsel from a 'been there, done that' perspective. As I watch my own nest emptying and sift through regrets and missed opportunities, there is a temptation to be cynical and gloomy. But Cindy's final section reminds me of what I've learned through my own homeschooling and parenting and gets me excited about what God will use me for if I make myself available to Him. Thanks, Cindy, for your beautiful, good, and true words.
Cindy is a good writer, as I knew from reading her blog, but she reaches a new level of polish and beauty in this book. She has chosen clever chapter titles and quotes that enhance each section. She uses cliff-hangers skillfully without overdoing the technique, and she narrates her experiences in a way that points beyond herself to the bigger picture.
This truly is a book for moms of all ages. Young mothers will benefit from wise counsel from a 'been there, done that' perspective. As I watch my own nest emptying and sift through regrets and missed opportunities, there is a temptation to be cynical and gloomy. But Cindy's final section reminds me of what I've learned through my own homeschooling and parenting and gets me excited about what God will use me for if I make myself available to Him. Thanks, Cindy, for your beautiful, good, and true words.
August 17, 2016
This book was why I sat in the bathroom for hours last night. MM has skyrocketed to the top of my 'must read' recommendations for homeschoolers. A quilt of wisdom, stitched with humility and humor. Allusions abound; I love their subtlety. No literary 'selfies' that point and say 'See what I just did there?' Cindy's tone is real and refreshing, and ultimately encouraging.
Later today I will start over, the slow go, copying sentences into my commonplace book. I will come back and give a proper response.
Later today I will start over, the slow go, copying sentences into my commonplace book. I will come back and give a proper response.
August 10, 2016
I had high hopes for this book. I love listening to Cindy Rollins on "The Mason Jar" podcast, and her ideas have been influential in forming me as a new homeschooling mom. I value her thoughts so highly that I rushed to pay full price + shipping for this book (I'm usually a bargain/thrift book buyer).
There are certainly nuggets of truth and wisdom, but I felt they could've been summarized in a couple articles or essays. The book had a schizophrenic tone where it couldn't decide if it was a memoir on motherhood or homeschooling. It skewed toward "mere motherhood" as the title implies; however, Cindy's notoriety as a homeschool expert (and its publication by Circe) gave me the impression I would find more wisdom on fulfilling my dual roles as mother and home educator. Even the bulk of the chapters dedicated to the growth of her family did not have a theme or big idea she followed to completion. It was a simple retelling of the years.
Her tone is conversational and humble, so if basic memoirs are your thing, you will find this worthwhile. Also, the last ⅓ of the book does focus on homeschooling, for the most part. So you will undoubtedly find truth there.
Overall, though, I expected more. Cindy needed a better editor to form her years of wisdom into a more readable product.
There are certainly nuggets of truth and wisdom, but I felt they could've been summarized in a couple articles or essays. The book had a schizophrenic tone where it couldn't decide if it was a memoir on motherhood or homeschooling. It skewed toward "mere motherhood" as the title implies; however, Cindy's notoriety as a homeschool expert (and its publication by Circe) gave me the impression I would find more wisdom on fulfilling my dual roles as mother and home educator. Even the bulk of the chapters dedicated to the growth of her family did not have a theme or big idea she followed to completion. It was a simple retelling of the years.
Her tone is conversational and humble, so if basic memoirs are your thing, you will find this worthwhile. Also, the last ⅓ of the book does focus on homeschooling, for the most part. So you will undoubtedly find truth there.
Overall, though, I expected more. Cindy needed a better editor to form her years of wisdom into a more readable product.
January 31, 2017
While I finished the book days ago, I've been processing my thoughts for a review. There has been much hype in the homeschool world regarding this book and I desire to give it a complete review.
I finished the book in 2 short settings. It is very conversational, easy to read, and yet certain portions I would re-read because the content required more concentration on my part. A few times I actually stopped, put the book in my lap, and said "wow" out loud as my mind was processing. There are not many homeschooling authors that walk you through their thought process. I found it refreshing.
There was one thing I struggled with throughout the book. Often times I found myself feeling sad about the future, sad that my children will grow and sad that there even is a future. Sometimes her honesty was depressing. Perhaps it's my age (39) and stage of motherhood? My oldest is 10 and I'm on the cusp of new mothering experiences. I do not think that was the authors intended purpose, and she does give much hope. So much hope in fact, that when I finished reading, I just wanted to spend time enjoying my family. And so I did.
Does it live up to the hype?
Yes. But not in the way I expected.
I finished the book in 2 short settings. It is very conversational, easy to read, and yet certain portions I would re-read because the content required more concentration on my part. A few times I actually stopped, put the book in my lap, and said "wow" out loud as my mind was processing. There are not many homeschooling authors that walk you through their thought process. I found it refreshing.
There was one thing I struggled with throughout the book. Often times I found myself feeling sad about the future, sad that my children will grow and sad that there even is a future. Sometimes her honesty was depressing. Perhaps it's my age (39) and stage of motherhood? My oldest is 10 and I'm on the cusp of new mothering experiences. I do not think that was the authors intended purpose, and she does give much hope. So much hope in fact, that when I finished reading, I just wanted to spend time enjoying my family. And so I did.
Does it live up to the hype?
Yes. But not in the way I expected.
July 6, 2021
This book is a balm to my soul. I read it last year and will reread it annually. Cindy encourages such a great balance of work, reading, reading aloud and narration. This year my take away is to work on written narration.
July 29, 2016
I loved this book!
Oh, it wasn't amazing, I must admit. It's a memoir from Cindy's 30 years of homeschooling, not a how-to-homeschool book, so don't open it expecting that. And really, for a memoir, it's frustratingly vague. Yet I understand her desire to protect her children's identities and not "air the family's dirty laundry". It's not always a fascinating read, but it was like a warm conversation with a good friend--an encouraging breath of sweet fresh air. I've been homeschooling for 16 years, so that's long enough to read between the lines of the various trends (good and bad) in the homeschooling movement that Cindy lived through.
I wouldn't have gotten as much out of it even just five years ago. I daresay this is not the best book for a younger, newer homeschooling mama. She likely won't appreciate it as much. There are things we simply don't know that we don't know until we get there. But maybe reading it will help her connect the dots when the time comes. And I came away both encouraged and inspired.
I chuckled aloud several times as I read, especially as she gently poked fun at herself: "Each morning we sang a new hymn, verse by verse. . .I was a bit neurotic about learning all the verses. Now I know that is called self-righteousness" (46) and "Obviously we weren't in the the habit of buying horses; we just read books about horses" (50) and after having drugs the first time for her ninth and final delivery "I would never be an obnoxious mother-in-law bragging that I had ALL my babies naturally" (64). LOL I thoroughly enjoyed her voice.
I also loved the way she sprinkled Scripture throughout (in her own voice, no quotation marks) and her frequent but casual references to great stories like The Chronicles of Narnia and The Lord of the Rings. She is definitely a book-lover.
In a nutshell, Cindy's book shares three main ideas (among other smaller ones) she has learned in her homeschooling journey: 1) It's easy to let our relationships with our children become idols in our hearts. 2) Be careful not to take too much credit or too much blame for the successes and failures of your children. 3) Motherhood is a tool for our sanctification.
She shares things that worked, and things that didn't. She warns those of us in the trenches not to make mistakes she made. She transparently shares the joys and struggles of various seasons, including her current season during which she has moved and no one knows the "former her" who homeschooled nine children but now see her with only her last child almost ready to leave the nest. (wouldn't that be so weird?!)
There were so many great nuggets sprinkled throughout. I could definitely chat this one out side-by-side in a couple of red chairs! I'll try to limit myself to just a few quotes:
"Motherhood is sanctification. Perhaps way more sanctification than you ever bargained for. . .There is no trite way to explain the heart-wrenching joys and sorrows you have seen. There is no way to warn the mommy next door or your daughter-in-law. It is a walk of joy that often includes the tearing off of the old dragon skin one painful layer at a time, made all the worse because you didn't even know you were wearing dragon skin. No one ever does" (ix).
"my lifelong pattern of hanging out with people who are smarter than me" (89). (I try to do this too!!)
"I suppose that I should have raked in a lot of wisdom and knowledge, and yet, the further up and further in I go the less sure I am about what I know. I know a lot less today than I did thirty-five years ago. . .After all these years, I don't know as much as I thought I did, but I hope that makes what I do know more valuable" (135).
(about reading aloud) "When we cannot escape ourselves, we can escape to other worlds together"(139).
"It seemed that I had worked passionately for nineteen years on a beautiful product and, in the end, he had become something entirely different than I intended. I did not recognize him at all. How could I go on creating beautiful pottery pieces if they weren't going to turn out as I had intended or hoped? Until one day I had an epiphany. I was not the potter. A potter was shaping my children, but it was not me. . .My son was not my product. He was the work of a great artist: the Creator of all" (156).
"Part of the sanctification of motherhood is learning to trust God with our children. . .Our children must not become 'Our Precious'" (161).
AND MY FAVORITE QUOTE OF THE BOOK:
"Josef Pieper tells us that leisure is the basis of culture. Most moms would laugh at the idea of leisure, but that is essentially the gift homeschooling gave us--the leisure to learn" (163).
Oh, it wasn't amazing, I must admit. It's a memoir from Cindy's 30 years of homeschooling, not a how-to-homeschool book, so don't open it expecting that. And really, for a memoir, it's frustratingly vague. Yet I understand her desire to protect her children's identities and not "air the family's dirty laundry". It's not always a fascinating read, but it was like a warm conversation with a good friend--an encouraging breath of sweet fresh air. I've been homeschooling for 16 years, so that's long enough to read between the lines of the various trends (good and bad) in the homeschooling movement that Cindy lived through.
I wouldn't have gotten as much out of it even just five years ago. I daresay this is not the best book for a younger, newer homeschooling mama. She likely won't appreciate it as much. There are things we simply don't know that we don't know until we get there. But maybe reading it will help her connect the dots when the time comes. And I came away both encouraged and inspired.
I chuckled aloud several times as I read, especially as she gently poked fun at herself: "Each morning we sang a new hymn, verse by verse. . .I was a bit neurotic about learning all the verses. Now I know that is called self-righteousness" (46) and "Obviously we weren't in the the habit of buying horses; we just read books about horses" (50) and after having drugs the first time for her ninth and final delivery "I would never be an obnoxious mother-in-law bragging that I had ALL my babies naturally" (64). LOL I thoroughly enjoyed her voice.
I also loved the way she sprinkled Scripture throughout (in her own voice, no quotation marks) and her frequent but casual references to great stories like The Chronicles of Narnia and The Lord of the Rings. She is definitely a book-lover.
In a nutshell, Cindy's book shares three main ideas (among other smaller ones) she has learned in her homeschooling journey: 1) It's easy to let our relationships with our children become idols in our hearts. 2) Be careful not to take too much credit or too much blame for the successes and failures of your children. 3) Motherhood is a tool for our sanctification.
She shares things that worked, and things that didn't. She warns those of us in the trenches not to make mistakes she made. She transparently shares the joys and struggles of various seasons, including her current season during which she has moved and no one knows the "former her" who homeschooled nine children but now see her with only her last child almost ready to leave the nest. (wouldn't that be so weird?!)
There were so many great nuggets sprinkled throughout. I could definitely chat this one out side-by-side in a couple of red chairs! I'll try to limit myself to just a few quotes:
"Motherhood is sanctification. Perhaps way more sanctification than you ever bargained for. . .There is no trite way to explain the heart-wrenching joys and sorrows you have seen. There is no way to warn the mommy next door or your daughter-in-law. It is a walk of joy that often includes the tearing off of the old dragon skin one painful layer at a time, made all the worse because you didn't even know you were wearing dragon skin. No one ever does" (ix).
"my lifelong pattern of hanging out with people who are smarter than me" (89). (I try to do this too!!)
"I suppose that I should have raked in a lot of wisdom and knowledge, and yet, the further up and further in I go the less sure I am about what I know. I know a lot less today than I did thirty-five years ago. . .After all these years, I don't know as much as I thought I did, but I hope that makes what I do know more valuable" (135).
(about reading aloud) "When we cannot escape ourselves, we can escape to other worlds together"(139).
"It seemed that I had worked passionately for nineteen years on a beautiful product and, in the end, he had become something entirely different than I intended. I did not recognize him at all. How could I go on creating beautiful pottery pieces if they weren't going to turn out as I had intended or hoped? Until one day I had an epiphany. I was not the potter. A potter was shaping my children, but it was not me. . .My son was not my product. He was the work of a great artist: the Creator of all" (156).
"Part of the sanctification of motherhood is learning to trust God with our children. . .Our children must not become 'Our Precious'" (161).
AND MY FAVORITE QUOTE OF THE BOOK:
"Josef Pieper tells us that leisure is the basis of culture. Most moms would laugh at the idea of leisure, but that is essentially the gift homeschooling gave us--the leisure to learn" (163).
March 21, 2017
You probably won't find this in the library (or Amazon, strangely), so just buy it. My friend, Shannon, lent it to me, after texting me pictures of certain paragraphs she thought I would like.
So here we have a mother, married at 18 I think, of nine children who homeschools and has moved A LOT around the country. Christian living. Educating children with lots of reading. The way she reflected on her life - the sunny times and awful times - touched me so deeply and made everything seem ok.
So many things to comment on:
*She begins, "It's a brash thing to write a memoir involving a family, who really has the right to tell her side of the story, the family story could be written eleven different ways. Some would be comedies, some would be tragedies". Isn't that so true, which is why you can't ever just gulp down one individual's story as fact, because there are a hundred other angles to it that the just one person can't relay. Which is fine, just always know that going in. This happens in my family all the time. I always remember things differently than my kids do and then they act like I'm making things up. But that's how I remember it!
*How they moved to a farm and she said, "I could write this chapter two different ways" - one would be to romanticize the farm life, Little House on the Prairie style - lots of opportunities to work hard for the kids! Animals! Space! But she chose the realistic route which was pretty torturing - I loved reading the unsugared version.
*Living in too many centuries. She said her husband would go to work in the 20th century and come home in the 18th century - to his family chopping wood, eating oatmeal, caring for animals.
*The answer to sorting socks - you don't. Or that turns into your whole life. Just put them in a basket and pick out what you need. This is brilliant and I'm doing it.
*Listen to how she lists her boys (8 boys, one girl). She had her first boy, then.." A second boy could play with the first. A third boy would be easier. A fourth boy would save money. A fifth boy would save energy on my part. A sixth boy only made sense. A seventh boy seemed like a necessity..."
*Talking about all the trouble the boys go into. The explosions and fires, etc. It got to the point where after an incident, she'd be like, "He was alive; I was unmoved".
*She never touched on meals or food. That's huge. Maybe she knew if she touched it, it would add 500 pages that she didn't want to include.
* I could have written this one - "When the boys are telling stories to each other, I am amazed at the things I knew nothing about. I thought I was with them all the time. Yet they managed to do so many things when I wasn't paying attention." You should hear the stories my girls tell me. I'm always thinking, But I was in the same house at the time. Wasn't I paying attention.
* How much she clung to the Bible and read it over and over. All the daily hours of reading she did with her kids. All the thousands of books she had. The living books. She dropped so many book names that I need to get looking.
*The idea of, after your kids are grown and gone, plugging your valuable self and mind into the lives of at-risk children to teach them.
And finally, something interesting. The author is on Goodreads - not just as an author but as a reader. It was fun to use the Compare Books feature and see all the things we've both read- lots! - and read her reviews on them. It's like we're friends now.
So here we have a mother, married at 18 I think, of nine children who homeschools and has moved A LOT around the country. Christian living. Educating children with lots of reading. The way she reflected on her life - the sunny times and awful times - touched me so deeply and made everything seem ok.
So many things to comment on:
*She begins, "It's a brash thing to write a memoir involving a family, who really has the right to tell her side of the story, the family story could be written eleven different ways. Some would be comedies, some would be tragedies". Isn't that so true, which is why you can't ever just gulp down one individual's story as fact, because there are a hundred other angles to it that the just one person can't relay. Which is fine, just always know that going in. This happens in my family all the time. I always remember things differently than my kids do and then they act like I'm making things up. But that's how I remember it!
*How they moved to a farm and she said, "I could write this chapter two different ways" - one would be to romanticize the farm life, Little House on the Prairie style - lots of opportunities to work hard for the kids! Animals! Space! But she chose the realistic route which was pretty torturing - I loved reading the unsugared version.
*Living in too many centuries. She said her husband would go to work in the 20th century and come home in the 18th century - to his family chopping wood, eating oatmeal, caring for animals.
*The answer to sorting socks - you don't. Or that turns into your whole life. Just put them in a basket and pick out what you need. This is brilliant and I'm doing it.
*Listen to how she lists her boys (8 boys, one girl). She had her first boy, then.." A second boy could play with the first. A third boy would be easier. A fourth boy would save money. A fifth boy would save energy on my part. A sixth boy only made sense. A seventh boy seemed like a necessity..."
*Talking about all the trouble the boys go into. The explosions and fires, etc. It got to the point where after an incident, she'd be like, "He was alive; I was unmoved".
*She never touched on meals or food. That's huge. Maybe she knew if she touched it, it would add 500 pages that she didn't want to include.
* I could have written this one - "When the boys are telling stories to each other, I am amazed at the things I knew nothing about. I thought I was with them all the time. Yet they managed to do so many things when I wasn't paying attention." You should hear the stories my girls tell me. I'm always thinking, But I was in the same house at the time. Wasn't I paying attention.
* How much she clung to the Bible and read it over and over. All the daily hours of reading she did with her kids. All the thousands of books she had. The living books. She dropped so many book names that I need to get looking.
*The idea of, after your kids are grown and gone, plugging your valuable self and mind into the lives of at-risk children to teach them.
And finally, something interesting. The author is on Goodreads - not just as an author but as a reader. It was fun to use the Compare Books feature and see all the things we've both read- lots! - and read her reviews on them. It's like we're friends now.
May 7, 2018
I put off purchasing this book as it is not yet available at amazon.ca. After reading raving reviews I bit the bullet, ordered from Circe, and called it a New Year's gift to myself.
If there were 25 hours in a day I would have read it in one sitting rather than two. It was lovely. Beyond lovely. And I've listened to Cindy's voice enough to feel as though she were reading the words to me. It was like lunch with a mentor friend.
Thank you, Cindy.
If there were 25 hours in a day I would have read it in one sitting rather than two. It was lovely. Beyond lovely. And I've listened to Cindy's voice enough to feel as though she were reading the words to me. It was like lunch with a mentor friend.
Thank you, Cindy.
June 18, 2019
This book felt like sitting down for coffee with a seasoned homeschool mom of 9. It was encouraging and entertaining. Rollins was real about her life and struggles, but at the same time presses her readers to faithfulness. “This is not about having the perfect family or the perfect school. Your success or failure doesn’t rest on your perfection, just your faithfulness.”
“It seems like I was always with them (my children), but was I paying attention?... I am sad that I spent time on the computer when I should have been paying attention to my children. I would be even sadder than I could bear for these lapses (and worse) if it wasn’t for Jesus. He bore my sins in His body on the cross that I might die to sin and live to righteousness.”
“It seems like I was always with them (my children), but was I paying attention?... I am sad that I spent time on the computer when I should have been paying attention to my children. I would be even sadder than I could bear for these lapses (and worse) if it wasn’t for Jesus. He bore my sins in His body on the cross that I might die to sin and live to righteousness.”
May 5, 2019
This book is a true gem, as is its author. I knew it was going to be good, but I wasn’t prepared to be moved to tears in the Author’s Note! Cindy is the real deal. She knows mothering is hard, and she isn’t afraid to tell it like it is. At the same time, though, she has a way of uplifting and encouraging other women that they can do this hard thing, by the grace and in the strength of God. Motherhood is truly sanctifying, and for that I am eternally grateful.
March 11, 2019
I am giving this book 5 stars simply because reading it was a "What, you too?" experience for me.
I am a lifelong home schooling mom with 7 children, 6 grandchildren and have had 11 miscarriages. Cindy and I love all the same books, have the same philosophy and methods, and have tried and discarded some of the same ideologies. Even the Ordo of my Amoris has been off in much the same ways she describes. :)
Some reviewers have said this book makes them sad. Yes, there is a certain sadness, because while motherhood is full of joy, it is also filled with the sort of sorrow that comes right along with genuine love, since "to love at all is to be vulnerable".
It is strengthening to have someone walk this path with us, and speak truth and encouragement to our fainting hearts, as Cindy does. She knows what it's like to love homeschooling and have a lofty vision for beauty; to think that one day we'll have the resources, energy, and support to do it all just right...and then suddenly we have only one last week with our child...suddenly, one by one, they start to leave, and we realize we never did get it right.
Then gradually we realize that this is how it was meant to be. Our labor isn't useless because it is flawed. Amazingly, the flaws themselves are part of the story God has written for us and for our children.
So much advice for moms is honest but fails to give us courage, or is full of encouragement without real honesty. Cindy communicates both, because she knows both. I feel like she and I are clasping hands as we press on toward the mark for the prize of the high calling we have in Christ Jesus.
"But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellence of the power may be of God and not of us. We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed— always carrying about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our body. For we who live are always delivered to death for Jesus’ sake, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh."
I am a lifelong home schooling mom with 7 children, 6 grandchildren and have had 11 miscarriages. Cindy and I love all the same books, have the same philosophy and methods, and have tried and discarded some of the same ideologies. Even the Ordo of my Amoris has been off in much the same ways she describes. :)
Some reviewers have said this book makes them sad. Yes, there is a certain sadness, because while motherhood is full of joy, it is also filled with the sort of sorrow that comes right along with genuine love, since "to love at all is to be vulnerable".
It is strengthening to have someone walk this path with us, and speak truth and encouragement to our fainting hearts, as Cindy does. She knows what it's like to love homeschooling and have a lofty vision for beauty; to think that one day we'll have the resources, energy, and support to do it all just right...and then suddenly we have only one last week with our child...suddenly, one by one, they start to leave, and we realize we never did get it right.
Then gradually we realize that this is how it was meant to be. Our labor isn't useless because it is flawed. Amazingly, the flaws themselves are part of the story God has written for us and for our children.
So much advice for moms is honest but fails to give us courage, or is full of encouragement without real honesty. Cindy communicates both, because she knows both. I feel like she and I are clasping hands as we press on toward the mark for the prize of the high calling we have in Christ Jesus.
"But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellence of the power may be of God and not of us. We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed— always carrying about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our body. For we who live are always delivered to death for Jesus’ sake, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh."
March 17, 2017
I liked the tone of the book, like you were sitting down having coffee with a friend. But the friend you are having coffee with, rambles a lot. Some of the things she says are funny and other things she says are really enlightening- but you have to get through a lot of rambling to get those nuggets.
There is no doubt she is a fierce woman and homeschool pioneer (similar to my own mom who homeschooled us during "the dark ages."). I felt that her lack of vulnerability in going deep in this book left me wondering what her journey towards sanctification was really about. I didn't really gain any insight there. I appreciate her boundary in not disclosing her family goings-on in detail. But I feel like the title of the book misled me in that way.
The lack of structure was something that I really missed in this book. Having said that-there are a couple ideas I walked away with as a homeschool mom myself.
There is no doubt she is a fierce woman and homeschool pioneer (similar to my own mom who homeschooled us during "the dark ages."). I felt that her lack of vulnerability in going deep in this book left me wondering what her journey towards sanctification was really about. I didn't really gain any insight there. I appreciate her boundary in not disclosing her family goings-on in detail. But I feel like the title of the book misled me in that way.
The lack of structure was something that I really missed in this book. Having said that-there are a couple ideas I walked away with as a homeschool mom myself.
September 5, 2018
I really enjoyed this! I appreciate Cindy Rollins ' writing style, sense of humor, and wisdom that comes with her experience of home-educating her children. What struck me most was how she captured the steady march of time: new babies, moves, various milestones reached. It felt like I was watching their family on fast-forward, and it served to help me appreciate just how quickly childhood goes by.
Recommended for home educators, especially those who appreciate Charlotte Mason and classical education. Recommended for newcomers, in-the-thick-of-it schoolers, and those whose children are approaching or have graduated.
I wonder if Cindy might consider writing another book specifically geared toward the empty-nester mom/home educator audience. I think there's a void here that she could fill.
Recommended for home educators, especially those who appreciate Charlotte Mason and classical education. Recommended for newcomers, in-the-thick-of-it schoolers, and those whose children are approaching or have graduated.
I wonder if Cindy might consider writing another book specifically geared toward the empty-nester mom/home educator audience. I think there's a void here that she could fill.
July 29, 2020
I just gave this memoir a second read, and just like the first time, it was a wonderful gift. As a second generation homeschooler, roughly the age of some of Cindy’s kids, some parts of the book felt like they were telling my own childhood story.
I also appreciated her commitment to tell the truth, but not to air her dirty laundry. Plenty of wisdom, good humor, and wise philosophy, and most of all, love in this book.
I also appreciated her commitment to tell the truth, but not to air her dirty laundry. Plenty of wisdom, good humor, and wise philosophy, and most of all, love in this book.
March 14, 2019
“We do not write our own stories; we just think we do. My story belongs to Jesus, so I already know that it has a happy ending. Here are a few of the chapters.”
Cindy Rollins writes like someone who has read a lot of good old books. Her memoir of her career as a homeschooling mother is homey and informal but filled with memorable turns of phrase. More importantly, she has grappled with ideas--and ideals--while experiencing the crucible of being a mom trying to get it right; and the wisdom she shares is hopeful and encouraging.
It’s easy to identify with her story. My dad and mom were also part of the wave of young parents who made the radical choice to opt out of mainstream schooling before doing so was normal. I recognize most of the books and curriculum to which Cindy refers, and I well remember the denim jumpers.
Other parts of her story ring less familiar. The chaos of country life with nine children, eight of them boys, is foreign to me. I am millennial enough to be a little. . . shocked? awestruck? at some of the “free-range” style anecdotes she relates. Children shooting shotguns at snakes outside and BB guns at mice inside are very much beyond my experience.
As a second-generation homeschool mom, it’s helpful to read about the struggle Cindy experienced when her children began to graduate. She says, “I am a mother at heart. I build a home, which seems like a place to stay, but really, it is a place to leave. That is the way of it. Children are meant to grow up.”
It’s hard to imagine my kiddos as grownups. Hard because it’s a blank unknown, but also because it’s scary. My sisters and I have seen so many homeschool moms struggle with “losing their purpose in life.” To tell the truth, I cringe a little when an older mom says I’m currently experiencing “the best years of my life,” because that makes it sound like everything after today is downhill. I don’t want to believe that! Cindy’s words heartened me.
Towards the end of the book she says, “Most moms would laugh at the idea of leisure, but that is essentially the gift homeschooling gave us--the leisure to learn. Homeschooling moms are what remains of the leisured classes in these hurried, frantic days. We are the Irish monks of our time, carefully preserving old library books (and even reading them).” I love this quote. Educating my children is important. Yet I, too, am learning and growing, I will never lose the vocation of student.
My biggest takeaway was the reminder that even though there’s never a lot of time in family life, doing a little bit of something consistently is a powerful thing. I am encouraged to continue teaching my children Scripture, the Small Catechism, and poetry. The discussion about the difference between memorizing (drill) and remembrance (an entire culture internalized and carried forward) is hugely helpful.
I’ve heard a few moms say this book fell flat for them. It’s brevity is mostly a strength, but readers without any background in homeschool culture, family life, and educational philosophy may get a bit less out of it. On the other hand, I recommend they give it a try. Cindy writes with such a beautiful balance of humor, realism, and grace--I feel rather as if she has been a mentor figure to me simply by sharing her own story.
Cindy Rollins writes like someone who has read a lot of good old books. Her memoir of her career as a homeschooling mother is homey and informal but filled with memorable turns of phrase. More importantly, she has grappled with ideas--and ideals--while experiencing the crucible of being a mom trying to get it right; and the wisdom she shares is hopeful and encouraging.
It’s easy to identify with her story. My dad and mom were also part of the wave of young parents who made the radical choice to opt out of mainstream schooling before doing so was normal. I recognize most of the books and curriculum to which Cindy refers, and I well remember the denim jumpers.
Other parts of her story ring less familiar. The chaos of country life with nine children, eight of them boys, is foreign to me. I am millennial enough to be a little. . . shocked? awestruck? at some of the “free-range” style anecdotes she relates. Children shooting shotguns at snakes outside and BB guns at mice inside are very much beyond my experience.
As a second-generation homeschool mom, it’s helpful to read about the struggle Cindy experienced when her children began to graduate. She says, “I am a mother at heart. I build a home, which seems like a place to stay, but really, it is a place to leave. That is the way of it. Children are meant to grow up.”
It’s hard to imagine my kiddos as grownups. Hard because it’s a blank unknown, but also because it’s scary. My sisters and I have seen so many homeschool moms struggle with “losing their purpose in life.” To tell the truth, I cringe a little when an older mom says I’m currently experiencing “the best years of my life,” because that makes it sound like everything after today is downhill. I don’t want to believe that! Cindy’s words heartened me.
Towards the end of the book she says, “Most moms would laugh at the idea of leisure, but that is essentially the gift homeschooling gave us--the leisure to learn. Homeschooling moms are what remains of the leisured classes in these hurried, frantic days. We are the Irish monks of our time, carefully preserving old library books (and even reading them).” I love this quote. Educating my children is important. Yet I, too, am learning and growing, I will never lose the vocation of student.
My biggest takeaway was the reminder that even though there’s never a lot of time in family life, doing a little bit of something consistently is a powerful thing. I am encouraged to continue teaching my children Scripture, the Small Catechism, and poetry. The discussion about the difference between memorizing (drill) and remembrance (an entire culture internalized and carried forward) is hugely helpful.
I’ve heard a few moms say this book fell flat for them. It’s brevity is mostly a strength, but readers without any background in homeschool culture, family life, and educational philosophy may get a bit less out of it. On the other hand, I recommend they give it a try. Cindy writes with such a beautiful balance of humor, realism, and grace--I feel rather as if she has been a mentor figure to me simply by sharing her own story.
February 2, 2023
So, so good. Will definitely be a reread.
July 13, 2022
"Josef Pieper tells us that leisure is the basis of culture. Most moms would laugh at the idea of leisure, but that is essentially the gift homeschooling gave us - the leisure to learn. Homeschooling moms are what remains of the leisured classes in these hurried, frantic days. We are the Irish monks of our time, carefully preserving old library books (and even reading them). In that way it is silly for us to measure our success by the immediate results - our son's SAT scores or whether our daughter got into Harvard. While we were busy thinking of our small families, we just might have been preserving something much larger."
I can go for being an Irish monk. ;) Thanks for all the encouragement and exhortation, Cindy - you are truly a blessing!
I can go for being an Irish monk. ;) Thanks for all the encouragement and exhortation, Cindy - you are truly a blessing!
February 14, 2017
Mere Motherhood has joined For the Children's Sake as one of my first recommendations for sane, simple homeschooling. It's not another tedious how-to, with day-to-day instructions drawn from someone else's life, but a memoir that shows, rather than tells, some of the realities of living and learning as a family.
Perhaps because we are of the same generation and read many of the same books, Cindy's story parallels my own journey in many ways (minus a few children; plus long-term caregiving). Reading it was oddly like a walk down memory lane. For younger readers, it is a practical, gracious reminder to focus on things that truly matter.
Perhaps because we are of the same generation and read many of the same books, Cindy's story parallels my own journey in many ways (minus a few children; plus long-term caregiving). Reading it was oddly like a walk down memory lane. For younger readers, it is a practical, gracious reminder to focus on things that truly matter.
June 6, 2019
It’s like reading a book written by an old friend. We’ve read the same books and lived similar lives... similar in that I’m like one of Cindy’s children though now with starting my own family I’m starting to feel like Cindy at the beginning of the book. I’m looking forward to handing this book to my mother. I know she will love it and relate to it too.
May 26, 2024
This book made me laugh and weep. I can relate to Cindy in so many ways. I didn’t want it to end! I sat down and read it in an evening, now to go back and commonplace!
August 15, 2016
We started homeschooling in August of 1990. Our two oldest children were 12 and 10 and were in difficulty in their schools. We also had a 3-year-old, a 20-month-old, and I was due with another baby that December. My husband was deployed to the Middle East for Operation Desert Storm. He missed our first year of homeschooling and the birth of our fifth child.
Although our initial plan was to homeschool only until we were in a different state and had access to better schools, we continued to homeschool our children. Our family grew, the lessons changed, my horizons broadened and we ended up teaching all nine of our children until they grew up and left. Currently the baby - now 14 - is still learning at home, and I'm seeing the end of my teaching days a mere 4 years away.
I bought Cindy's book because I knew it would be good. I planned to hold it in reserve for a few weeks or months, then enjoy it as a "treat" book. I decided to read a few pages and didn't put it down until I'd finished it. It was a treat, and I loved it.
This book is funny, and wise, and encouraging, and is a good story. It's a real story about real people who are loving and trusting a real God.
For a couple of decades my go-to book to recommend when I try to explain why we read aloud and read a lot was Annis Duff's "Bequest of Wings" and her sequel, "Longer Flight." They're good (and I reread them as soon as I finished "Mere Motherhood"), but "Mere Motherhood" tops them easily.
At this time in my life I am giving away books and dismantling our home library. With only four more years to go, I'd rather see the books go to other families who will use them and enjoy them as we did, or I'd like our local library to sell them at the periodic book sales to profit the library. Cindy Rollins' book is a keeper. It's going on the shelf beside the books by Annis Duff, to reread and enjoy and to recommend to other mothers, homeschooling or not.
Although our initial plan was to homeschool only until we were in a different state and had access to better schools, we continued to homeschool our children. Our family grew, the lessons changed, my horizons broadened and we ended up teaching all nine of our children until they grew up and left. Currently the baby - now 14 - is still learning at home, and I'm seeing the end of my teaching days a mere 4 years away.
I bought Cindy's book because I knew it would be good. I planned to hold it in reserve for a few weeks or months, then enjoy it as a "treat" book. I decided to read a few pages and didn't put it down until I'd finished it. It was a treat, and I loved it.
This book is funny, and wise, and encouraging, and is a good story. It's a real story about real people who are loving and trusting a real God.
For a couple of decades my go-to book to recommend when I try to explain why we read aloud and read a lot was Annis Duff's "Bequest of Wings" and her sequel, "Longer Flight." They're good (and I reread them as soon as I finished "Mere Motherhood"), but "Mere Motherhood" tops them easily.
At this time in my life I am giving away books and dismantling our home library. With only four more years to go, I'd rather see the books go to other families who will use them and enjoy them as we did, or I'd like our local library to sell them at the periodic book sales to profit the library. Cindy Rollins' book is a keeper. It's going on the shelf beside the books by Annis Duff, to reread and enjoy and to recommend to other mothers, homeschooling or not.
January 30, 2024
This was a lovely homeschooling memoir. The chapter on their disastrous year living in a farm was so hilarious I read it out loud to my husband. There are some great things to learn from this book as a homeschooling parent. The reflections about getting caught up in “homeschool culture” and doing things because other people think it’s a good/virtuous idea are an important warning. A few chapters rose to the level of succeeding as a well written memoir, but mostly I’d just recommend this for mothers of many/homeschooling parents.
May 1, 2022
I loved this book! Wish I could buy it for all my homeschooling-mom friends. I love Cindy's humility and wisdom. Though I am homeschooling young children, I remember those early days of homeschooling from the perspective of a student. It is a beautiful, hopeful, encouraging read. Thank you, Cindy, for being willing to share those "less than perfect" moments along with the good ones, and for the encouragement to pursue our own education alongside that of our children.
July 23, 2016
I just read this book in one sitting. When it was announced I already knew I would love. I enjoy listening to Cindy on The Mason Jar podcast. This book is wonderful. It is inspiring, insightful, and do, so honest. I smiled, laughed, and teared up throughout. I took away so much and so appreciative that Cindy shared this with all of us.
February 3, 2017
Just sorry it took me so long to get to the end!
March 19, 2023
I loved this memoir of a homeschooling mother of 9. It probably helps that I listen to Cindy on the Lit Life podcast every week. It brought her to life to read this book. The book is an easy read but filled with so much wisdom. Even though I am basically done with homeschooling my family, I still found the book worthwhile. I love that she also addresses when homeschool mom's finish schooling their own children. I can't recommend this book enough to any mom.
April 6, 2021
I avoided this book for years, because I knew there would be tears, and I read it all at once on Easter afternoon, and there were tears. Cindy Rollins and I met once for lunch, but we are friends over decades in that email group she mentions, "the brain trust." She is right that it's an amazing collection of human beings hidden to the world but doing the most important work. Every day, every year the work of a mother changes, and in the empty nest years it shifts from a lot of doing to a lot of prayer and trusting. It is the fabric of life, embodying a calling. It is bewildering but a precious privilege. I begin to see the glimmer of what it means to fill up the sufferings of Christ. I begin to understand the Father's love for us, the Son's, and the inward kindling of the Holy Spirit. Cindy captures this deep reality in the often-amusing minutiae of a house full of children with their own souls they in turn must learn to tend.
August 28, 2017
I have maybe promised myself that I'd never read (OK, start but not finish) another momlit book again.
This book was not that. This book was basically a memoir. A really, really good one.
I should have known this, because I listen to and love Cindy Rollins' podcast The Mason Jar on The CiRCE Institute podcast network. And I love anything The CiRCE Institute publishes. But still, I had my doubts that a book by a probably-perfect homeschooling mother could speak my language.
While both parenting and education how-tos can be helpful, they don't typically capture my attention or my heart. This did. Mere Motherhood was not a how-to. It was a story. There was not one sentence that led me into homeschool despair or mommy guilt. Nor was there a single paragraph that existed to help me live my best homeschool life now or have a new kid by Friday.
In this sweet book, Rollins remembers for us the important things. She does tell us to do a thing or two (mostly: read to, with, and near your children), but I swear it was told through her own remembering. Through story. Through humor. Through imagination. Through looking back in love and awe and even some sadness at moments in her own life, and letting us look with her.
This is the kind of book that gives life.
This book was not that. This book was basically a memoir. A really, really good one.
I should have known this, because I listen to and love Cindy Rollins' podcast The Mason Jar on The CiRCE Institute podcast network. And I love anything The CiRCE Institute publishes. But still, I had my doubts that a book by a probably-perfect homeschooling mother could speak my language.
While both parenting and education how-tos can be helpful, they don't typically capture my attention or my heart. This did. Mere Motherhood was not a how-to. It was a story. There was not one sentence that led me into homeschool despair or mommy guilt. Nor was there a single paragraph that existed to help me live my best homeschool life now or have a new kid by Friday.
In this sweet book, Rollins remembers for us the important things. She does tell us to do a thing or two (mostly: read to, with, and near your children), but I swear it was told through her own remembering. Through story. Through humor. Through imagination. Through looking back in love and awe and even some sadness at moments in her own life, and letting us look with her.
This is the kind of book that gives life.
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